Random “Monday” Thoughts

Hello and Happy sorta Monday friends. I know it’s really Tuesday but let’s be honest, the Tuesday after a long weekend actually feels worse than any regular Monday doesn’t it?

Was I the only one who woke up today totally stunned, thinking it was Sunday with a slight knot in my stomach when I realized I had to actually go to work today?????

The family and I had a pretty busy Memorial Day weekend this year. Sadly, we were not able to visit the Jersey Shore (in-laws live in Long Beach Island) but we did get invited to a couple of bbqs and the twins marched in their first ever parade with some tball teamates (and daddy).

The weekend was filled with lots of children fighting and many margaritas which could be why my pants are feeling a bit snug today.

And now without further ado, I bring you my random thoughts….

1) Horay for the long, open front cardigan

I could literally hug the person (HAS to be a female) who invented the long, open front cardigan. It is by far my absolute favorite fashion go-to item. If I had to guess, I would say I wear one at least 2 times a week.

I own them in a bunch of colors and fabrics. Some have pockets, some have dolman sleeves (for when I want to look like I am a bat) and some are strictly for winter months and others, like the new one I am wearing today, just scream summer!!

Today’s is white, 3/4 sleeves AND the back is a little longer so it covers by butt. Seriously, does it get any better than that?? I was able to find this beauty at the Loft this weekend AND it was on sale for $44.00 with an extra 50% off.

SOLD!!

2) I suck at Candy Crush

A few weeks ago, I talked about my new app obsession Candy Crush. I play it all the time on my iPhone and even got the husband hooked.

I hooked up my Facebook account and now I am able to see how many “friends” also play and what levels they are on (their FB profile pic appears on the cute Candy Crush map).

However, as much as I love this game, I think it is time I come to terms with the fact that I absolutely SUCK at the game.

I have played Crush for at least 3 weeks and I am only on Level 38. This is not “normal” and I am beginning to think I should  just give up.

First, I thought it was just a fluke that it was taking me a few days to pass a few levels. I would waste all my lives in a 10-minute setting and was constantly Googling tips to cheat beat the level I was on.

A couple of weeks ago, after being stuck on Level 33 for almost a week, I actually asked someone in work if they would clear the level for me and keep it our little secret.  (in my defense this guy is on Level 216).

Well I never had the work guy beat my level, I was able to do it myself but I have been on Level 38 for a week and I don’t think I will ever clear it.

The husband has well surpassed me and I see FB friends whizzing past me daily. I’m torn, do I give up or stick with it? Thoughts anyone???

3) Sometimes being a mom isn’t so bad

As most of you know, my son J was diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder about 21/2 years ago. The journey with J has been a roller coaster ride of emotions and “stuff” .

J has really good days, really bad days and everything in between. Through it all J has put on a brave face and is almost always smiling (unless he is angry). When he is happy there is nothing more beautiful than his big, blue eyes looking back at you.

The last couple weeks I have been in an “ASD SUCKS” kinda mood. I know… it can be so much worse; I should be thankful J is doing so well;  there are so many others that are worse off yada yada yada. Still, when it is your kid and you have to watch him/her struggle daily it doesn’t matter it just sucks.

This past weekend, however, was A-Mazing with J. It started last Friday when J’s school hosted a talent show. J attends a school for kids with special needs so I was really not expecting much from the talent show.

J’s teacher had mentioned that she had worked with his class for weeks on a routine but kept it a secret. All we were told was that the kids should wear black pants and a white shirt.

The morning of the show, I asked J what he was performing in school. He gave me a shy smile and did some hand motions that made no sense to me at all. Ok, whatever I thought as I got him ready for the bus.

When I arrived at his school, the parking lot was packed. I quickly grabbed 2 seats, the husband was meeting me there, and anxiously waited for the show to start. I grabbed a program, and quickly became annoyed at THE most annoying special-needs- mom in the row ahead of me. She had saved the entire front row and there was no way I could see over her huge ponytail (and big mouth).

The principal handed out programs and under Jake’s class it said  ”My Girl”. It all made sense, J is in a class with 5 boys and 1 girl. OMG this is going to be awesome….but will J do it or freak out???? 

J was act #6 and it felt like FOREVER until his class got on “stage.” Finally I heard the music and in walked J’s class. The boys were wearing top hats and bow ties and the little girl sat in the middle on a bench covered in pink tulle.

They all took their places and did the entire routine to perfection! I could not believe my baby was doing that in front of a room full of people. No way that could have happened 2 years ago. To me it was a miracle.

When they took their bow, the room erupted in applause as the teachers shot confetti into the air. They did it – J did it!

I don’t think I will ever be able to describe the feelings I had when J walked off the stage. It was a combination of so many emotions and feelings all mixed together. I just remember thinking that everything would be ok and J will be alright.

My Guy

Have a great week everyone and thanks for reading.

Random Monday Thoughts (on Wednesday)

Welcome to another edition of Random Monday Thoughts. Yes, I know today is Wednesday but Monday was my birthday and I never got around to blogging so I figured what the hell, just do it today.

Hey, it’s my blog and I can do what I want right??? (lol). And now on to my Random Thoughts….

1) Yay me!

I am happy to report that yesterday’s post Belated Birthday Thoughts brought in a 2013 record-breaking 115 views!!!!!!!!!!

I know we don’t blog for numbers. We blog because we want to and it’s a  place to share our thoughts and that stats are not important but…..come on 115 is in the three digits!!!!

I have to be honest, my 115 view would not have been possible without the help of  fellow U of D alumni Jeff Pearlman. Thank you Jeff  for allowing me to link to your birthday post here yesterday AND for tagging me on Facebook!!

2) Team Jake

“Team Jake”

As I have mentioned before, this past weekend my family and I participated in Children’s Specialized Hospital’s 7th Annual Walk & Roll event.

I am so thrilled to report that “Team Jake” raised a whopping (insert drum roll) $1030!!!!!!

Thank you to all the friends and family that supported us we really appreciate it!

3) Everyone needs a little vampire love

I am SOOOOO happy that I listened to Mrs. Jeter and stuck with The Vampire Diaries.

I am LOVING the oh-so-hot vampire brothers Damon and Stefan Salvatore who have come back to Mystic Falls (after 145 years) and really shaken things up.

At first, I didn’t think it was possible to love another vampire the way I loved Edward Cullen. However, Stefan and Damon (more Damon) have proved me wrong.

Their love and devotion to the slightly annoying Elena is nothing short of “breathtaking” (Can you name the Seinfeld reference???).

4) Black & White Day

I was very excited to wear my new white skirt to work today. It was a recent Loft purchase (on sale with an additional 60% off) and I thought it would perk me up on this cloudy, über humid day.

I paired the skirt with a black, lace trimmed cami and black, open cardigan and black peep toe wedges. Not wanting to go too overboard, I accessorized with simple silver bangles and hoops. Voila outfit accomplished.

This morning I was reading People.com working, when I got an IM from my friend Nicole asking if I wanted to go for a belated birthday lunch.

YES!!  I immediately responded. Now I would not be stuck eating my boring ham and swiss sandwich at my desk again.

Imagine my surprise when I ran into Nicole in the lady’s room a little while later saw that she too was wearing a white skirt, black, lace trimmed cami and black cardigan!

WTF???!!!!

Aside from the fact that Nicole is about 5 inches shorter than me and 30 pounds lighter, we looked like twins – in a dorky way.

We laughed and muttered something about “great minds” but ultimately decided to postpone lunch for a day when we did not look like a sorority scheme gone bad (lol).

5) Kids are annoying sometimes

PLEASE don’t get me wrong, I LOVE my children. I may not always like them but I love them with all of my being.

However, these 4 children that I carried, gained a total of 180 pounds with and gave birth to (by C-section) are really starting to drive me CRAZY!!

WHY is EVERYTHING with my kids a fight???!! Everything. I am not talking about the usual things either like home work and sibling rivalry. I am talking about stupid, mundane things. Why?? Please help me understand.

For example, to celebrate the last 26 days of school, the twins’ school has assigned each day a letter of the alphabet with an activity associated with this letter. Today’s letter is “G” and it was “green day.”

Sounds easy right? NO.

Instead I spend a half hour arguing with M that his brother’s blue shorts were not  green and that the 3 green t-shirts I held in my hand were the only green clothes that we owned.

Really??!!

What is the big deal? It’s Green Day, just put on a green shirt and be done with it. WHY do we have to argue???!!

AND M is a boy, I thought boys were easy-going and didn’t care what they wore?? Have moms been lying to me all these years???

I won’t even mention the fight over Taco Tuesday with the twins last night and how L kicked the crap out of me today because I dared to tell him it was time to change his diaper, get dressed and go to school (he told me school was closed today).

Well there you have it, some very random thoughts on a Wednesday afternoon. Thanks for reading. Enjoy the rest of your Hump Day!!

Belated birthday thoughts

As some of you know, I went to college at the University of Delaware WAY back in the early 1990s (gasp!!). I started off my college career as a very shy, homesick  girl with HUGE “jersey” hair in a “triple” (3 girls crammed into a dorm room made for 2) on the first floor of the Russell A dorm.

While I can not remember the names of all the 40+ kids that lived on that floor in the fall of 1990, I can actually remember a few.

There were my neighbors, Paul and Dan who were a little OCD with Taco Bell.  Julie and Dawn who lived down the hall, the annoying sorority girls who lived across from me and this tall, lanky kid from NY named Jeff.

Whereas I tended to hide in my room, Jeff was a fixture in the hallways talking to everyone and anyone. He was sarcastic and loved to do this joke about Jim Henson and Kermit the Frog.

Over the years I would see Jeff on campus and we would chat. He was a writer for Delaware’s newspaper The Review and by senior year he was the editor.

After college we exchanged some letters (yes, we had to write letters and mail them with a stamp) before losing touch.

Life went on, I got married, had some kids and then came Facebook.

Voila there was Jeff after all these years.

Jeff Pearlman was now a “famous” author AND writer for Sports Illustrated. He was married to a woman he completely adored and had 2 beautiful kids.

Over the years, we exchanged messages and I read Jeff’s posts and blogs on Facebook. While I couldn’t always relate to the political or sports-related ones I could always relate to his blogs on family and kids.

This past April, Jeff did a blog in honor of his 41st birthday here. He reminisced about celebrating his 21st birthday 20 years earlier at the Stone Balloon in Newark, DE.

After reading it I was instantly transported to my own 21st birthday also spent at the Stone Balloon.

May 20, 1993 was the series finale of the beloved NBC sitcom Cheers and I remember cramming in the Cristina Towers lounge with friends watching the finale and saying farewell to Sam, Norm, Cliff, Woody and Carla.

Afterwards, my roommate and walked to the Stone Balloon and took our place in line with some friends. I was holding my ID tight anxiously waiting my turn to get inside.

When we walked in, I felt disappointed or let down. The inside of the famed Balloon looked like the basement of a fraternity house not the mecca I had heard about for years on campus.

It was hot and dimly lit packed with co-eds drinking beer. The music was blasting and I happily downed any shot given to me.  Finally I was 21!!

Funny, I can’t remember what I wore yesterday but somehow I can remember a drunken night 20 years ago.

That YOUNG, drunk girl had no idea that 20 years later she would be a mom to 4 boys living in suburbia and driving a mini-van.

Young Me had no clue about “life.” That it a mixture of joy/sadness/humor and strength.

The good eventually outweighs the bad and everything happens for a reason – even if that reason isn’t always clear.

I won’t lie, there are times I wish I could go back in time and be that young, naïve 21yo again - except with the knowledge I have now.

I would tell her to loosen up, follow your dreams, never give up and most importantly be happy.

Stop comparing yourself to others, appreciate your true friends and family and all the little things in life. And know that you are not as bad as you think you are (lol).

Thank you Jeff for this little trip down memory lane and for allowing me the use of your blog.

Thanks for reading, enjoy your Tuesday.

My pseudo long, lost daughter

This past Tuesday I was given the honor of chaperoning the annual PLD Kindergarten Class Trip 2013. Please…hold your applause (for now at least). It really wasn’t that big a deal. Pretty much everyone asked to  chaperone picked but still, for me it’s the little things in life (LOL).

So at 8:50am me and some hot mama chaperones (Mrs. Mayor and Hot T-ball Mom) boarded the big, yellow school bus for our destination Jenkinson’s Aquarium in Pt. Pleasant, NJ (Yay Jersey Shore!!).

Oh, I jumped ahead of myself, before boarding the bus, we were each assigned a list of “monkeys” (the kids we would be chaperoning). Mrs. Mayor and HTM were each given 4 kids while I hit the jack pot with just my kid J (the quiet twin) and his friend L.

YES!! Only 2 kids how great is that??!!  I thought. You see, I was just a tad bit nervous about this whole chaperone thing….because….well….I am not really good with kids.

Yes, I know, I have 4 but they are mine. I carried them for 9 months and gained 80lb, 50lb and 50lb respectively. They belong to me and I am obligated to love and care for them – JUST KIDDING – I love my kids but they are MINE.

And being mine they “get me” and know what they can/can not get away with. My boys know all my “looks” and that when I call their name using a certain tone that they are in BIG TROUBLE.

I shared my concerns about chaperoning with the husband and he said not to worry and  stay close to HTM (she’s a teacher in real life) and everything would be fine.

Finally the 2 school buses were loaded with 73 kindergarten kids and off we went.

Have you even been on a school bus with 40-something 5-6 year olds on a class trip??? If you have not been lucky enough to experience it, I really don’t know how to accurately describe the noise level.

I guess it was equivalent to when Mrs. Jeter and I had floor seats to Bon Jovi back in 2001 and could barely hear ourselves for the 2 plus hours we were there.

Holy crap can those kids yell!!! OMG it never stopped. Between that, the annoying dad chaperone who thought it was “fun” to do knock-knock jokes the ENTIRE ride and L and S who could not stop hitting/kicking/touching it was a long ride and this mama was missing her coffee.

Finally we arrived at the aquarium and the teacher Mrs. P told us we had to break up into groups of 17 (wtf??). I had just started gathering my stuff to get off the bus when I heard Mrs. P call my name. Uh oh…

Mrs. L?? One of our mommies did NOT show up to chaperone so I am giving you 2 kids from the am class in addition to the 2 you have. That’s ok right? Oh, by the way, they are 2 girls – Sam and Karis.

WHAT????!!!

Mrs. Mayor and HTM laughed (a lot) as we tried to get our 17 kids to stand in a line. It was like herding cats getting these kids to not only stand but form a line. Here are some highlights:

L stand on the white line, no the white line in front of you…it’s right there. No, S you can not sit on the ground, you need to stand up, stop crab-walking. J get back in line, no the white line. S stop touching L. Boys and girls can we all stand in a straight line??? Please??? and finally Hey! whoever does not stand on the white line has to go back on the bus!

Mrs. P then told us that we had some time to kill and that we could either take our groups on the beach or walk the board walk. We unanimously picked beach.

O-M-G was I really on the beach???? Us moms were trying to take it all in. The beach, the salt air and the sun while also looking around for any visible damage leftover from Hurricane Sandy.

Just as I was trying to take a picture of myself with the ocean in the background (to post on FB of course) Mrs. P walked Sam and Karis over to me. Girls, this is Mrs. L you make sure you stay with her today ok? Yes they chanted in unison.

When I looked down at them to say hi, I was drawn to Karis. She was THE cutest little thing!! Long, brown hair with the sides pinned up wearing cute pants. Her smile was huge and she had big brown eyes and was always smiling. You could just tell she was a sweet girl and would be a pleasure to chaperone – unlike L who was throwing sand.

I was commenting to Mrs. Mayor how cute she was when Mrs. Mayor said ha, she could be like the daughter you never had.

OMG that was it….Karis was the epitome of what I always thought my little Ava/Hanna/Grace/Abby/Bryn would look like and grow up to be. I was smitten <3

Throughout the field trip I watched all my “kids” but always kept my eye on J (because he was mine) and Karis (because she was supposed to be mine). I watched her interact with the other kids, touch the starfish and squeal with delight when Lucy the Seal came out to say “Hi.”

During lunch I had to help her open her water and she was telling me all about her new little brother and her little sister and how her aunts and cousins and grandparents are staying with her in her house – but they don’t live there all the time. SOOOOO freakin’ cute.

It was such a change from the Lego, Ninjago, poop and Skylander talk me and my men have.  I love my boys and would never trade them n in but I can’t help but wonder what it would have been like to have had just 1 girl.

Someone to dress up in pink and take for manicures and to the mall. Someone who would never “leave” me the way all boys eventually do when they get married and start their own lives.

I am often asked if I will ever “try for the girl” and my answer is NO! that shop is closed tight!! God has a plan for me and it did not involve girls – although I did give it my all (lol).

73 kids waiting patiently in line

My Quiet Twin

Summer is almost here!

Random thoughts on a Monday morning

Happy Monday everyone, don’t you just LOVE a Monday morning?? LOL!!

It is raining here in the beautiful Garden State, it is actually supposed to rain the next couple days,  so that makes this Monday all the more merry. The weather should not surprise me since I spent 2 hours yesterday doing the semi-annual (and dreaded) “clothes switch”.

Last night I was texting with my mom when she, passively aggressively, mentioned that I have not been blogging regularly. My first thought was Ummmm…no kidding but somehow I didn’t think she would appreciate that response. I toyed with ignoring her comment but what fun would that be. No, instead I came up with this witty lame response I’m in a slump with the blog. I don’t know why. Eloquent right?

Mom, being Mom, wouldn’t drop it and came back with …just write like you used to no? no funny stories?…

Ugh, that totally annoyed me. What, did Mom think funny stories just “POP” into my head randomly? Is my life SO humorous that blogs detailing the adventures at Casa Chaos are in abundance???

Moms words stuck in my head long after the texting conversation ended. Of course she was right, I have made excuses for months about my lack of daily posts. Truth is I started over-analyzing my blog ideas.

I became WAY too obsessed with stats and “likes” and comparing myself to other bloggers in WordPress and Tumblr (yes, I strayed from WordPress but shhhh don’t tell). I forgot that we are all just one, big blogging family, and instead turned it into a competition that I knew I would NEVER win.

Anyway, I guess the pity party has gone on way too long and now it’s time to kick out the last guest (me), clean up the mess and move on.

Driving into work today, my mind was a blur. I was belting out Pink songs (LOVING the new duet with the guy from Fun), trying to sort out all the random blog ideas in my head.

While sitting in traffic on George-Davison Road (damn school buses), a thought occurred to me. Hey, instead of picking just one “thing” to blog about today, why not just post about a couple random things????

So friends in the great blogosphere, I bring you “Random Thoughts on a Monday Morning”

1) Shopping with almost 7yo boys is an experience.
This should not have surprised me but yet I had high hopes for taking the twins shopping. It’s not their fault, their attention span is just nill. One minute they are looking a t-shirts and the next they are hiding under rounders.

I would pick out cute shirts and plaid shorts just to be told  No thanks or Mooommmmy that is for girls.

Somehow I was able to get them to focus just long enough to get what we needed. Apparently, M is an impulse shopper because as we were headed to the check-out he talked me into this

Mr. Cool

2) I embarrass very easily:
On May 18, 2013 my family and I are participating in Children’s Specialized Hospital’s 7th Annual Walk & Roll to raise money for the hospital. We have been a part of the CSH family for the past 2 years and they have helped to make our journey with J a little easier.

So the point of a fundraiser is to obviously raise funds. Sounds easy enough right? Well it should be except I get totally embarrassed asking for sponsors. My face turns red just thinking about it.

I thought a good way to raise funds, and awareness, was to advertise the event at work. The marketing guy at my office was kind enough to make up some amazing posters that I hung in the kitchens and coffee stations.

However, as I was taping up the posters it hit me Holy Crap my face is blown up on the poster!!! OMG now co-workers would be forced to see my HUGE face as they get their morning coffee. Yikes.

I hid in my cube, mortified of my face, and prayed no one would vandalize my posters – my friend N reminded me we work in a law firm not in a junior high school.

Well the posters have been up for 5 days and so far they are intact. I even had 2 people ask me how they can give. I am hoping by the end of the week I won’t even notice my huge head when I get coffee or water.

Here is the link for our page if you are interested in making a contribution (it’s tax-deductible!!)

3) Nothing beats a good book:
I love reading. I don’t really have a particular genre that I am fond of, really,  I like a good story. One that holds my attention and makes me temporarily forget my problems. A story that when it is over, makes me sad and wish it wasn’t done.

Last week I finished reading Beautiful Ruins by Jess Walter and I LOVED it!! It was the story of an almost-love affair that begins on the Italian coast in 1962 …and is rekindled in Hollywood fifty years later.  Mr. Walter transported me to Italy and its beautiful coast and made me sad that I have not been able to experience the sights and sounds of Italy for myself.

I did not want this book to end and was sad when I had to say good-bye to Dee and Pasquale. I highly recommend it to anyone who is a sucker for a love affair.

4) Mrs. Jeter thinks I could write a novel (LOL):
Jeter and I were texting last night when she asked me if I would be interested in participating in National Novel Writing Month with her in November. At first, I thought she was kidding. Write a novel?! I am not a writer, I am a semi-novice blogger, what was Jeter thinking??

But Jeter was serious, said we could be each other’s moral support and that I would be good at it. Honestly, the thought of this both intrigues and terrifies me. Jeter and my blogging mentor CC are always telling me that yes, in fact I am a “writer” but I don’t know.

I thought I would run this idea past you guys and see what kind of feed back I get. Do you think I could write a short novel? If so, about what???

Thanks for letting me share these random thoughts with you today. Enjoy your Monday.

Life goes on

Hi everyone. Sorry I went MIA again – maybe that should be my new blog name (lol). After the horrific events in Boston, it felt almost disrespectful to blog about the everyday nonsense and drama in my life.

I remember being really young and my neighbor telling me to ask my mom where she was when Kennedy was shot.

I had no idea what my little friend was talking about, who the heck was “Kennedy” and why were they shot??

I did eventually ask my mom, although I can’t remember what her answer was. I asked her how she was able to remember something that happened so long ago and she said it was a life changing event, something you always remember.

Oh, ok I thought to myself before I went back to play. “Life changing” at the age of 5 is losing your favorite toy little did I know.

In the years since I have experienced a lot of life changing events and I can remember where I was for all of them.

The space shuttle Challenger explosion,  Oklahoma City bombings, Columbine, the first World Trade Center bombing, 9/11, Newtown and now Boston.

It’s sad that we as a nation and world have experienced so many horrific events in a lifetime. Sadly, we will more than likely add more to our memories over time.

Personally, I can’t let myself dwell too much on all the media coverage. Yes, I follow current events and like to know what is going on in the world, but if I devote all my waking hours to the 24/7 coverage, quite frankly, I would never leave my house or let my kids out of my sight.

I caught myself the other day, reading several articles on the young, 8yo victim in Boston. My heart broke for his family. His mom and sister both suffered serious injuries and his family is left trying to make sense of it all while trying to get through the next hours and days.

I felt myself getting into a mood and had to force myself to put the Iphone down and do something else. I don’t remember if it was refereeing an argument with the twins or helping my 3yo put on his cape.

Whatever it was, it made me realize that my kids have no idea of the troubled world we live in. Yes, they know there are “bad” people out there that do “bad” things but that’s it.

To them, not getting a toy on a Target run, their beloved Lego creation being smashed by a sibling or their pet Bella going to live with the angels in Heaven is as bad as it gets.

I envy them. They are innocent, happy and good at heart. They need to enjoy life and experience all it has to offer.

For them and for us, life goes on even after tragedy. I keep reading on all the media and social media sites how America and Americans will persevere because we are good and good always trumps evil.

It’s true. Look at all we have gone through and we always come out stronger as a nation and community.

Today my 3yo’s daycare was holding a prom for the students. Parents were encouraged to dress their little ones in their “Sunday Best” and the kids would be treated to music, snacks and LOTS of dancing.

L looked pretty darn handsome when he left for Prom today. His smile was huge and he was so proud when I told him how cute he looked.

Life goes on.

My Little Prom King

I am THE MEANEST mommy ever

This has been a crazy week at Casa Chaos with me going back to work and the kids settling into another new routine. I thought we were all adapting and told myself by next week it should be good – well as good as it can ever be with 4 young boys.

I will admit that I may not always be the most patient mother, especially in the mornings before (and during) coffee, but my children (2 in particular) could really test the patience of a saint at times.

Whenever I tell someone  I have 4 boys, within seconds this response follows

“4 boys really?? You going to try for the girl?? oh….well… you are lucky boys are SO much easier than girls.”

I laugh and change the subject thinking about how nuts my house is 24/7.

Lately my “older” twin M has been a little moody. Not sure if it is the terrible 6s, a mid-life crisis or maybe his room isn’t zen enough. Ever since the womb, M has been either hot or cold.  There is no in between with him.

One minute he will tell me he loves me SOOO much and the next he’ll tell us he wants to live alone.

I remember the first time M yelled I hate you!!! It was like a kick to the stomach.

How could my M, my little Bugman, say such a thing to me HIS OWN MOTHER???!!!! I carried him AND his brother for 37 1/2 weeks and gained 80 pounds! I have done everything for him and he has the nerve to hate me?????

I remember telling Mrs. Jeter and she laughed and said her son tells her that all the time. Other friends told me the same thing and after a while I got over the hurt.

Now M says it to me almost daily so the words don’t sting or even phase me – mostly. Once in a while it gets to me and instead of ignoring it,  I  tell him to go find a new mommy. I have even offered to help him pick one out from the
“New Mommy Catalog.”

A week or so ago, M and I were arguing over something “important” (probably chicken nuggets or juice) when he got really upset and yelled YOU ARE THE MEANEST MOMMY EVER!!!!

Gasp – say what????!!

I can’t remember what set M off that day but I gave him some time to cool off. I didn’t bother him or try to talk to him until he had calmed down. A little while later he came over, sniffling and wiping tears, and told me he was sorry and he loved me and I was the best mommy.

So sweet right??

Well since then M has told me at least 5 or so more times that I am a “mean mommy” so I thought I would make a list of all the mean things I do and share it with my friends in blogosphere.

In no particular order, here are M’s reasons why I am THE meanest Mommy ever:

1) I always make him take a shower/bath when he is playing Legos

2) All I ever make is chicken and chicken is dumb

3) He is never allowed to have soda and Mommy and Daddy drink it and it’s just NOT FAIR

4) I refused to buy him the $400 Death Star Lego and some other random $50 Star Wars ship at a recent trip to Target

5) How dare I pick him up from after care and not bring snacks with me

6) When M is in time out, I don’t  allow him to have a cookie or watch tv

7) I always make him get dressed for school when he is watching tvf

8) We never have any good snacks, he is sick and tired of Cheez Its, Goldfish, cookies and crackers they are SO BORING

9) M wants to live alone because our house is too loud and messy

10) OMG how could I not have jean shorts for him to wear to school today???!

This list is just from the past week or so, and as you can see, I am THE meanest mom alive! Poor M, he has no idea what he is in for in the years to come (lol).

Enjoy your Thursday!!

ps – This list is just from the past 2 weeks, I am sure I will update it soon

It’s dress weather!

It is finally feeling like spring in the lovely Garden State. The sun is shining bright, my daffodils are blooming and today we it’s supposed  to reach a high of 79 degrees!!

The boys were thrilled that they did not have to wear a jacket to school today (it’s the little things) and I am amazed that this time last week I was wearing my down jacket – only in NJ.

Having always lived in NJ I know better than to get too excited for this springtime weather.  You see, New Jerseyans rarely get a real spring.

Rather we start off the season with temperatures near freezing. Just when you think you will never be rid of your gloves, Mother Nature throws us a bone for a week or so and the temps rise to the mid-70s. People are happy and smiling, car windows are down and life is good.

Around this time you start to put away your winter clothes, pack up the Ugg boots and fill the drawers with t-shirts and tank tops. Maybe you get a pedicure and start to dig out your flip-flops or do some sandal shopping at lunch.

Winter is gone!

And then…..the temps drop. Frantically, you search for your raincoat and long-sleeve cardigans and complain to co-workers that it will never be warm again.

Just when you think you will never see the sun or get to wear that cute new sundress BAM! The temps go back up…and up and up until it’s 90 degrees from now until Halloween.

That my friends is “spring” in NJ.

Hope you enjoyed your quick NJ meteorology lesson and now on to more important things – clothes!!

Springtime weather always makes me think of my friend Midgie. Midgie and I worked together for some 10 odd years and as soon as the weather started to get warm, Midge would get all excited and declare it was “Dress Weather!”

Soon afterwards, you could bet money that Midgie would strut her cute self into work wearing an array of cute sundresses or skirts complete with sandals and a smile.

Yesterday when I checked the weather and saw that it would be in the 70s at least half of the week, I texted Midge to alert her to “Dress Weather” and to see if she would be partaking in the ritual.

Hmmmm, not that I think about it, Midge next did let me know what she was going to wear (the nerve!).

Regardless, today I pulled a skirt out of the closet, ironed it and even shaved my legs all in honor of “Dress Weather”.

As I stood in front of the mirror, blinded by the whiteness of my legs, I was tempted to change into pants. Ugh, why can’t I look as cute as Midge in a skirt?

Well I didn’t change (I was running late) so here I sit in my skirt and bare legs (with my little heater under my desk) happy that it is spring and “Skirt Weather” – at least for now.

Happy Spring everyone!!

It’s the little things

Hello friends out there in the great and almighty blogosphere!! I am back from another blogging absence that was far too long.

I don’t know what happened. One day I was home with my herniated disk (and 3 pinched nerves) blogging about Snow Chairs and the next thing I know over a month has passed and I have written no blogs – gasp!!

Friends and family dropped hints and even offered up some blog topics but nothing worked.  It wasn’t really a writer’s block, more like lack of motivation.

I was home over 8 weeks on short-term disability and while my back was healing and I was feeling better, I just felt blah.

Maybe it was the tail end of winter or the kids being sick or just life in general. Who knows. Whatever it was it caused me to almost fear the blog. I would think of a topic or idea and completely over think it.

Thoughts like Is this funny? Would anyone like it? Maybe this topic is too boring or Suppose people laugh???? were consuming me.

Once I started comparing myself to other blogs and bloggers I knew it was time for me to take a mini vacation.

I reminded myself that I started this blog for myself, not to get followers and fame (not that I would mine either LOL). I decided I would not blog again until I felt ready.

Which brings me to today Monday, April 8, 2013. Today is my first day back at work since February 5th and I was more than a little nervous to come back.

I felt like I was starting at a new school, not coming back to the place I have worked since November 2000.

I tried not to be a total Debbie Downer this morning, even when the twins yelled at me that they were too tired to get dressed.

All morning my stomach was filled with butterflies that would not go away. I changed my outfit three times before finally giving up since the kids would be late for the bus.

In the van waiting for J’s bus, I started to think about some blog topics, hoping the “right one” would magically pop into my head.

J was not a happy camper today. J is my 4yo (almost 5) with autism spectrum disorder and he is very “routine driven.” For the last 2 weeks, J’s entire routine has been out of whack and today was his first day back at school.

J sat in the van writing out words on the back of a car seat instruction manual, quietly whining that he didn’t want to go to school or see his beloved teacher Miss Heidi.

I tried telling J that I understood and that Mommy didn’t want to go to work either (what? he was the only one there to listen to me complain) but J wasn’t buying any of it.

When the bus pulled up he took a deep breath and ran toward it (he wanted to beat his friend C to the door). I yelled Hey wait…give Mommy a kiss! but he didn’t hear me or didn’t care.

I watched as he buckled himself into the bus seat and chatted with my neighbor. Suddenly the bus doors opened and the driver called my name.

Startled I asked what was wrong Nothing…J wants to give you a kiss she said.

And with that my little boy appeared, tears in his eyes, and gave me a kiss before getting back in his seat and buckling himself in.

J and I got to spend a lot of “alone time” together the past couple weeks - a rarity since he shares me with 3 other brothers. Sometimes he gets lost in the craziness of our house and the demands of life.

When I got to work I was not in a good mood. Sure, I put on my “game face” as I greeted people who pretended they were SO happy to see me back in the office.

All morning I could not shake the image of J’s face when he left. Just thinking about it now makes me a little sad. I looked through the pics on my phone of some of the stuff J and I did the past couple weeks and decided (with the nudging help of Mrs. Jeter) to do a blog.

I don’t know if this is my best blog, or if it is interesting or thought-provoking. However, I do know that every once in a awhile I need to step back and appreciate what I have and smile at the little things.

Happy Monday – hope everyone has a good week.

Angry Birds bike helmet

Liberty Science Center

Strike a pose

My “snow chairs”

“Snow Chairs” courtesy of Wikipedia

It is a snowy Friday here in the Garden State and this blogger is not too happy about it. The thing is, I really just do not like snow. Yeah I know, it looks pretty when it falls, the kids love to play in it and there is nothing better than cuddling up to a nice fire, with hot coco in hand, after a day of frolicking in the snow.

Really?? I disagree.

Snow is cold and messy, causes unnecessary traffic delays and accidents, makes people feel the need to stock up on milk and bread AND it causes me have to go outside and clean off my van (in the snow) before herding my crew to the bus stop.

You know, now that I think about, I think the real reason I hate the snow has a lot to do with cleaning off my car. Let me explain.

I grew up in a small town in Bergen County, on the cusp of Passaic County really. While I would not call my town “urban” it was certainly not a suburban utopia like Wysteria Lane.

My brother, mom and I rented the upstairs apartment of a 2-family home and had to climb up what seemed like a million steps (it was probably more like 10) to get to our front door.

Our house had no driveway which meant we had to park on the street. Normally this wasn’t a problem. Most of the other houses on the block had driveways so a parking spot was not that hard to come by.

However, weekends were a different story. Did I mention the tiny “pub” across the street from my house (it was more of a dive bar but pub sounds better)?

Yes, I lived across the street from The Gregory Club and on weekends its’ clientele spilled over onto our street once the parking lot was full. Actually this wasn’t a problem for me until I graduated from college and got a car (don’t ask why it took so long) but I digress.

Anyway, getting back to the snow.  Growing up, when it snowed, my brother and I would watch my Mom bundle herself up in her snow gear and go outside to shovel her car out and clear a path to the front door.

My Mom was a single parent, and not always equipped with the best tools for foul weather or household repairs. Most times Mom was able to shovel with a regular snow shovel. Other times, though, I can remember her using a dirt shovel or a broom to get the job done. Really it depended on what was around at the time of the storm.

Mom would shovel for what seemed like hours, as my brother and I watched her from the living room window (this is when we were little, when we got older we had to help). If there had been a big storm, Mom would sometimes take a break, and come inside for something to drink and a new pair of gloves.

Believe it or not, there was a method to shoveling out the car. First, it was important to start shoveling on the driver’s side and throw all the shoveled snow into the street (so the snow plows could flatten it out). The goal being to get the driver’s side door open so you would be able to start the car and let it “warm up.”

Second, you continued shoveling until it was possible to drive the car out of the spot and double park it somewhere on the street. This step was key as it provided you with more room to shovel AND allowed you to clear a nice big spot for your vehicle.

How big or small your parking spot was, depended on how many cars were parked on the street and if there was a car parked in front or behind your car. Lastly, when shoveling was completed, you backed your car into the parking spot, stood back and admired all your hard work.

Now for the good part.

When it was time to leave for school, work or the store, there was NO WAY in hell Mom (or anyone else on the block) would risk leaving a great parking spot, up for grabs. It was just unheard of.

So…..what did we do to “reserve” our spot????

We did what any other “normal” Northern New Jersey resident did – we put a garbage can in the cleared parking spot.

This was just the “it” thing to do. Everyone did it  – no, seriously EVERYONE.

During the winter months it was not uncommon to see a chair, bucket, ladder, garbage can  or even a vacuum cleaner (I swear I saw a vacuum holding a spot in Wallington, NJ circa 1989) holding a spot on the street.

In addition, it was an unwritten rule that under NO circumstances was the garbage can (or other holding object) to be removed unless it was by the “owner” of the parking spot.

I am not kidding you. This was “law” and it was strictly adhered to. My entire life, I thought everyone did this. Really, I didn’t know any better. I assumed everyone got out of the car (in the snow) and helped their mom put a garbage can in a parking spot when they left for school or work. It was all I ever knew.

It was not until I met the husband in 1997, and he laughed (hysterically) at me when I explained the significance of the garbage can on our snow-covered street. The husband was from “south” Jersey and had no idea what the hell I was talking about. He thought it was a joke – and it so was NOT a joke.

I remember calmly explaining the tradition to the husband and him asking me what stopped people from moving the can. You just don’t, its common sense was my reply.

I lived on the same street for over 20 years and not once did our garbage can ever get moved - until our last winter there but I can’t even talk about that it is just too painful.

This morning a I cleaned the van off with my snow broom (and a herniated disk) I thought about all those winters and the garbage cans and couldn’t help but smile – and wonder why I don’t live in Florida.

Hope you enjoyed my little snow memory. TGIF everyone!