Turkey Candles

Everything has been a blur since Sandy crashed a couple of weeks ago. Halloween was “rescheduled” and now I look at the calendar to see that Thanksgiving is NEXT WEEK! How the hell did that happen?

Anyway, I was putting away the Halloween decorations the other day and came across something that always makes me smile – my Grandma’s turkey candles.

Grandma had decorations for all the “major” holidays – Christmas, Easter &  Thanksgiving. Grammer was not allowed to go “all out” with decorating since Grandpa was a bit OCD but still she put out what she could depending on what the holiday was.

Gram was not a fancy decorator. She didn’t care  about Lenox or fancy crystal chachkies . No, Christmas at her house guaranteed the plug-in Christmas tree, a manger scene, some holiday doilies, a fake poinsettia for the kitchen table (along with a plastic Xmas table-cloth and place mats) and at least one Santa pot holder hanging from a kitchen cabinet handle.

Easter was Easter Bunny dish towels and some other Bunny stuff scattered throughout the house mixed in with a cross and/or Jesus since it was a religious holiday.

Thanksgiving was more low-key for Gram. There were the obligatory table-cloth and place mats and the occasional plastic cornucopia and maybe a turkey dishtowel but that was usually it –  except for the turkey candles.

These candles looked exactly how you would imagine them too – medium-sized, turkeys in gold and brown. Gram would put them out either on the kitchen table or on the radiator behind the kitchen table (it had this covering over it that made it look more like a bench).

I can remember sitting at the table drinking tea and eating graham crackers (a staple at Gram’s house) making fun of her turkey candles. I wasn’t being serious, just teasing her (something my brother and I ALWAYS did). Gram looked at me, in her flowered shirt, angel pin affixed on upper right hand side and said Stop it Nikki…my candles are cute!

She wasn’t a mushy, huggy-kissy kind of grandma, she was more a tell it like it is, give it right back at you grandma.

She LOVED to be out – whether it be the mall or Atlantic City and would spend any extra money she had on new curtains (always beige) or a top from Sterns. She LOVED Oprah (never call her at 4pm) and Jerry “Stein-feld” and would hide copies of the Star and National Enquirer under the couch cushions.

Gram did not take crap from anyone – including me. Unnecessary drama annoyed her and she could usually see right through someone. There were numerous times when I would hug her and say You are THE best Grandma! only to have her reply What do you want Nikki (with a smirk and a laugh).

She was a great shopping partner and you could always count on her to go with you to the diner for coffee or lunch. You also knew if you were bored, you could call her up or pick her up no questions asked (usually).

Gram has been gone over 11 years now and I think of her often. Usually something will spark a memory for me or my mom will say something that sounds very “Rose-like.”

I was the only grandchild she saw get married back in 2000. Now, all 5 of us have been married and 4 of us have kids of our own (I win for most kids).

When I found the turkey candles, I got sad. Maybe it was the Sandy aftermath, the insane kids downstairs or pms but I started to cry a little as I held the funny looking candles.

I kept thinking about Gram and how I could always ask her opinion on things because she was always honest – no sugar-coating EVER! I wonder what she would say to all the “drama” I have endured these past couple months (some of which was self-produced) and all the “stuff” I have fallen for and put up with?

Gram would probably tell me to knock it off, move on and tell the people who have hurt or disappointed me to Go Scratch! She would say that life is too short and to just enjoy it and stop worrying.

Why is that advise always easier said than done?? Ugh.

The turkey candles are now proudly displayed on my mantle. The kids were SO excited when they saw them and asked where I got them. I told them that they belonged to Mommy’s Wawa (they call my mom “Wawa”) and one of the twins pointed to her picture on the table which made me smile and tear up at the same time.

For Gram’s sake I will TRY to stop being so gullible (which is out of character for me anyway) and to stop making mountains out of mole hills (Mrs. Jeter will appreciate this too). I will also TRY to put an end to unnecessary drama because really,  why bother? Lord knows my house has enough drama of its own to last me a lifetime!

However, I do have one last request of Gram.

Grammer, can you PLEASE give me a sign of some sort, something to let me know that everything will be ok?? If you could make it an easy sign to spot, that would also be good - thanks you are THE best grandma ever! (LOL).

Bubbles and Sidewalk Chalk

I was very behind on my Easter Bunny duties this year and found myself in Target (my home away from home) late last Wednesday night. The Easter aisles were completely picked over and desperation was starting to take over. Hmmmm, maybe J would really like the fairy princess headband and didn’t M say he wanted a pack of white t-shirts?

It was getting late and I needed to finish up and get home. I did a last lap around the store and came up with 2 things to complete the Easter baskets – sidewalk chalk (the 64-pack by Crayola because this Bunny was sparing no expense) and bubbles. Hopefully the boys would be distracted by all the candy and snacks and not be too disappointed with the chalk and bubbles.

Easter morning came and the baskets were hurriedly torn apart. There were candy wrappers, half eaten lollipops and plastic grass all over the living room. As the kids started to come down from their sugar high, they noticed the bubbles and chalk on the counter and asked if they could go play outside.

The weather was beautiful on Easter. The sun was out and bright and there was a nice breeze, it was a perfect spring day. The boys patiently waited for us to open the the bubbles and dig around the soapy bottles to find the wands. Before we knew it the yard was a sea of bubbles as the kids chased one another and laughed till their sides hurt. L alternated between spilling his bubbles and saying more bubbles? every 5 minutes.

Soon the twins broke open the chalk and before we knew it, the sidewalk was one endless, artistic masterpiece. The husband and I stared in amazement as all 4 boys, spread out on the chalk covered sidewalk, and not only shared the chalk,  but drew pictures without fighting! It brought me back to my childhood and playing hop scotch outside my grandparent’s house. I used a rock to draw my masterpieces, now the kids were using chalk in colors I never knew existed and loving every minute.

When it was time to come in for lunch they were literally covered in chalk from head to toe. Normally I would roll my eyes and complain about their messy clothes. However, not today. Watching them enjoy themselves and be truly happy was all that mattered. The clothes could be wiped off but nothing could wipe away their smiles.

Who knew something so small could make 4 kids so happy? I guess it is the little things that matter after all.

Who’s afraid of the big, bad Easter Bunny?

Spring is finally in the air. The temperatures are rising, the clocks have been sprung ahead and as anyone who has received a Pottery Barn, Pottery Barn Kids or Williams Sonoma catalog knows, Easter is right around the corner.

Displays of pastel eggs and bunnies and everywhere as stores showcase adorable Easter dresses (with matching purses and shoes) for girls and khackis and sweater vests for boys. Let’s not even talk about the candy that has taken over Target and CVS – candy always looks better when it is miniature and in a pastel wrapper.

Before the eggs are dyed and hidden and the baskets are stuffed there is one other tradition parents, especially of little kids, partake in the obligatory Easter Bunny photo. Only in America would you see parents dress their kids up in their “Sunday best” only to be dragged to the local mall where they will wait on a huge line to sit on the lap of a man, dressed in a 7-foot bunny costume, sitting under an arch of spring flowers and decorated eggs.

If you are thinking to yourself, Gee she sounds awefully bitter you would be correct. Let me explain, I do not have anything against the Easter Bunny, I think he (or she) is great. Anyone who leaves candy (chocolate AND jelly beans) is super in my book. However, it is not me with the problem it is my kids. You see, my children fear the Bunny.

They didn’t always have a fear of the Easter Bunny. For the twins’ first Easter I dressed them up and marched them down to the Princeton Marketfair and waited for our turn with the Bunny. They sat on his lap, albeit a bit stunned, and I left smiling with my 5×7 and 4 wallets. I looked pitifully at the parents whose kids were crying and refusing to go near the Bunny never thinking that would be me.

Wasn’t I in for a surprise the following December when the twins threw a HUGE fit would not go near Santa Claus. Thinking they were just having an off day, I tried again in the spring with the Bunny and was met with a similar outcome. Two more kids came and things got no better. I was persistent. Every December and March/April I would drag my brood to the Marketfair, wait on line and then be totally disappointed when they would adamantly refuse to pose with the Bunny and/or Santa. I would pout, throw a mild tantrum, call my mother and go home photo-less.

This really should not surprise me. I was not a fan of the Bunny or Santa. I am pretty sure there are more than a couple pictures of me screaming sitting on someone’s lap not looking happy. I just thought it would be different when it was time to take my own kids. After all, their father never cried.

The first couple times I cried (when I got in the car). When the kids got older, they would think I was a horrible mommy who didn’t care enough to take them to see the Bunny or Santa. Never would they remember the shrieks and tears, they would just see no pictures and think the worst.

Well by the time it was L’s turn to try Santa or the Bunny I had given up. I tried my best but there was no way around the fear my kids had of the gigantic bunny with an oversized plaster head. The kids will just have to take my word for it that they sobbed and refused to go under the floral arch. Instead they will have to make due with the 100s of photos of them, laughing and smiling while looking for Easter eggs or opening up their baskets. I am hoping they will not be too scarred but just in case I always have this as prood that I tried:

These little lights of mine – boy do they shine!

Today was the twins Easter show at pre-k (technically the Palm Parade). I bought them new polo shirts and even ironed their khakis before school (there would be other parents there and they had to look good). I took a half-day from work and was armed with my iPhone (completely charged) and a front row seat. This would be my “babies” last Easter show.

The piano started playing and soon I saw the twins marching at the front of the line and my heart skipped a beat. Look at how handsome and big my babies have gotten. They waved to me and the husband and I noticed their cheeks get a little pink once they realized how many people were there to watch.

They stood next to each other and would occasionally glance in each other’s direction (when not looking at the floor) during songs. I tried to hide my laughter when Josh would make a funny (probably embarrassed) face after each song (my aunt swears it is the same face I make).

Before we knew it the show was over. The crowd erupted in applause and the kids marched back to their classrooms. Another milestone over but many memories made.