trying to find myself and humor in life

Red-faced and SO NOT fancy free

English: iphone Deutsch: iphone

English: iphone Deutsch: iphone (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Life was SO much easier in the 90s. Cell phones were a rarity and the only way to communicate with someone was on a regular telephone. If the person you wanted to talk to wasn’t home you left a message on their answering machine end of story.

Now we have smart phones, texting, instant messaging, GoogleTalk, Facebook, Twitter and email so you can pretty much “talk” to someone 24/7. This is great and I love technology as much as the next person. Heck, I literally LOVE my iPhone but there are times when a little less technology would be a really good thing, let’s say for example, after a night of drinking which always leads to –  the drunk text.

I know I am not alone in this who among us has not drunk texted (emailed, etc)???? The thing about the drunk text is that it seems like such a GOOD idea at the time. You are drunk, happy (to the point of giddiness) and want to share that with EVERYONE in your contact list. You send off random texts like a maniac waiting for anyone to respond and further encourage your behavior.

You tell yourself you are fine, completely coherent, and ignore all the spelling suggestions and auto text prompts as you attempt to “touch” tiny keys on your smart phone. OMG I am SO funny…wait till so and so reads this…I am not even drunk run through your head just before you fall asleep pass out clutching said phone.

The next day you wake up feeling groggy and slowly you feel a knot forming in the pit of your stomach. You start to get hot and sweaty and memories of the previous night slowly creep into your mind and then you see it, the phone just lying there and BAM it all comes back to you. WTF did I do/say????!!!!

It can’t be that bad, I wasn’t even that drunk you think as you pick up the phone. Then you start to read through the mess of texts you sent and O-M-F-G is all you can say.  Hiding under the covers (or in a closet) is the only viable option for the next hour or but then what? It’s not like you can hide forever right? Slowly you get up, try to hold your head up (well as best you can) and attempt to face your friends the world hoping and praying that none of the texts went through and it was all just a bad dream.

Such was my life Sunday morning. Saturday night the husband and I went out to dinner and I gulped one too many glasses of wine too quickly. I was not able to hide long, since there were multiple requests for juice and breakfast, but I tried. I am still embarrassed today about the things I sent to Midgie and Mrs. Jeter and god knows who else.  I hope I wasn’t too embarrassing and that they can all forgive me or at least laugh behind my back. Mrs. Jeter was great (per usual) and told me it was all fine but I know she is thinking that is one messed up chick!

I would like to think that I will not drunk text again but really, how realistic is that? I have been drunk dialing/texting for a VERY long time and I don’t think I can just stop cold turkey. Hopefully next time I am drunk with the urge to “talk” to friends, I will remember the feeling of complete and total humiliation (I have now) and will think twice before hitting “send”.

For now I will attempt to hold my head high and own up to my texts. Who knows, maybe I will even be able to laugh about them one day.


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